Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Busy Mama Fill Your Tank Challenge Day 10!

Thanks to those of you who have been participating in the Fill Your Tank Challenge. I for one and so glad to have this challenge to keep me plugged in to my personal goals! It's a very busy time for Established Ways, and we are growing and stretching!

I have been struck once again lately by how often I get apologized to for normal "mom" stuff, and how family unfriendly our surroundings can be. I hear "I'm so sorry" WAAAY to much from moms, both strangers and moms that are already friends. One place I most recently heard it was in the checkout line, as a cute little girl was slow getting out of the cart, and was temporarily "in my way." (To be doubly clear, I didn't perceive it as such.)

Don't get me wrong, I do think that we should train our children not to scream in the checkout aisle and get in people's way in the grocery store. However, if they are less than socially "perfect," and I have done my best effort to help them arrive in good form, I would simply say with a smile, " we are working on that." (What bugs me is the constant feeling around me that children are just an inconvenience.)

This is an example of putting too much on our own plates. When you emotionally take responsibility for how your child chooses to respond even though you are training them properly, you are weighing too heavily upon yourself!

On the flip side, if you have not done everything ahead of time that you can do to be prepared,  the preparation alone is where you messed up. Tell yourself the truth. You must still be consistent with your child and make it clear to them where they fell short of your expectations in a factual way. However, the interaction is less likely to be meltdown-ish if you can get over yourself, and own up to your lack of preparation. That enables you to move on to addressing their behavior, or perhaps more importantly, their needs.

This is Day 10 of the Fill Your Tank Challenge! Weigh in and be accountable. I will check in with a comment when I have finished my workout!

Don't Just Get Organized! Get Established!

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